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Hey, I am Ivana!

I am the author of Motherhood – The Unspoken, motivational speaker, award-winning mentor, mother of three mixed-race boys (including twins) & wife to an amazing husband, who is on a mission to create a world where mums don’t suffer in silence. After my twin boys, Henry & Mason, were born in 2016, I struggled with …

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ivanapoku

❤️ Creating a world where mums don’t struggle in silence
🤰Mum of twins+1
👀 Featured in @Forbes @BBC
👇 Author of ‘Motherhood - The Unspoken’

When I decided to write 'Motherhood: The Unspoken'

When I decided to write 'Motherhood: The Unspoken', one of the most common questions I heard was: Isn't there already something similar out there?

And honestly, nothing frustrated me more than this question.

Because here I was, eager to pour my heart out and determined to make a real difference for mums around the world—and yet, many were focusing on the wrong thing, missing the bigger picture.

Of course, there ARE already incredible books on new mum life—like What to Expect When You’re Expecting by @heidimurkoff, The Unmumsy Mum by @mrsgifletcher , and Why Did No One Tell Me? by @physiomumuk , to name a few. I’ve read and admired many of them.

Yes, we touch on similar themes, but every book carries a unique perspective, shaped by personal experiences. This book is MY truth, my heart on paper, and that’s what makes it different—just as every other book has its own special voice and message.

So instead of worrying about whether a similar book existed, my only concern was how to reach as many mums as possible—so that no mother would ever have to feel as I once did: lonely and hopeless.

Because at the end of the day, it’s not about comparison—it’s about connection and making a difference together, each of us in our own unique way. ❤️

Love,
Ivana xx

#newmums #newmoms #firsttimemum #postnatal #postpartum #pregnancy

I'm incredibly excited and grateful to have this a

I'm incredibly excited and grateful to have this amazing woman, Nadia Essex, on board my audiobook project, aimed at ending silent struggles and raising awareness about postnatal depression (PND). ❤️

As a PND survivor, I'm convinced that the #1 reason new mums struggle in silence is due to unrealistic expectations surrounding early motherhood. When they don’t feel the happiness society expects, they often end up blaming themselves, which leads to even more challenges—and, for too many, postnatal depression.

I wrote Motherhood: The Unspoken to break this cycle. The book shares realistic insights into life as a new mum, reveals the untold truths about motherhood people (and prenatal classes) don't talk about, features real-life stories, shows mums what emotions are normal to experience (and why), gives them reassurance, helps them see the light at the end of the tunnel - and, in the process, helps them reduce the risk of PND.

The audiobook I'm currently working on features mums from around the world, representing diverse backgrounds and experiences. The goal is to unite a wide range of voices to create lasting change and support mums everywhere. ❤️

80% of the profits will be donated to the @pam.foundation, a charity founded by Hamish Magoffin in memory of his wife and son, whom he tragically lost to postpartum depression.

I’m always looking for more people to join this cause, so if this message resonates and you'd like to support this cause too, I’d love to hear from you! 🥰

Please send me a DM @ivanapoku or email me at Ivana.poku@mumsjourney.com.

Thanks so much! Let's make a difference together. ❤️

With love and gratitude,
Ivana xx

PS. To get a copy of the book, click the link in my bio 👉 @ivanapoku

#postnatal #postpartum #firsttimemum #fourthtrimester
#pregnancy #newmum

Joanne Sharkey appeared in court after admitting t

Joanne Sharkey appeared in court after admitting to killing her newborn son in 1998—a crime committed while suffering from severe postnatal depression and hiding her pregnancy. The world sees her as a monster, an evil who deserves to rot in hell.

The problem is that society doesn’t see mums with postnatal depression and postnatal psychosis as ill. They’re seen as weak. Crazy. Evil.

Yet PPD is a life-threatening illness—just like cancer, diabetes, or heart disease. They are not much different. You can’t willpower your way out of it. It can consume you. It can be deadly.

When I had PPP, it was as if someone else had taken over my mind and body. It was excruciatingly terrifying and lonely. I had intrusive thoughts, some telling me to hurt my own children. I didn’t act on these thoughts, but it doesn’t make me better or stronger than Joanne. I was just lucky.

This is why I speak out—because stigma and silence don’t just hurt, they kill. And if we’re don’t break the stigma, we’ll keep losing lives.

Please save and share to help stop the stigma. It may feel like a small step, but it’s the small steps that make the big ones. 🙏❤️

#postnataldepression #postpartumdepression #ppd #poa #maternalmentalhealth #postpartumanxiety #postnataljourney #lifewithanewborn

Oooh stealing this one from @babycentre. When spea

Oooh stealing this one from @babycentre. When speaking to a new mum, don’t state the obvious. State what’s not obvious and she needs to hear. It can save her life. ❤️

#newmumlife #firsttimemums #fourthtrimester #postnatallife #sleepdeprivation #lifewithanewborn

When we had our twins in 2016, we had no family ar

When we had our twins in 2016, we had no family around to help.

Nor did we have any friends—we had just moved to a new town.

I had severe postpartum depression.

Our babies were colicky for six months and cried most of the time.

I spent around 12 hours a day alone with them, often trapped indoors as there was no lift in our building, and it was VERY hard to get out with two babies.

My husband and I were severely sleep-deprived.

When the boys were around eight months old, I was close to breaking point.

I had suicidal thoughts and intrusive thoughts of hurting my kids.

I knew that if we didn’t get sleep soon, it could easily end in tragedy. (If you have experienced sleep deprivation as a new parent, you KNOW I am not exaggerating.)

We tried different methods, but nothing worked.

Then I heard about controlled crying - from an expert with a degree in child development and years of experience in the field.

Although the idea of letting my boys cry for a few minutes without intervening was breaking my heart, at that point, it was about safety and pure survival.

So we gave it a go. I would hear the boys cry in one room, and I cried in the next. But I knew it was better than them having a dead mum. (Again, not exaggerating.)

It was extremely hard, but after only two nights, they slept through, and we started to feel like humans again. I could start to function and heal. And most importantly, I could be a good mum to my boys—to be there for them in the way they deserved.

Now, the internet is flooded with posts from “experts” saying how bad sleep training is. It’s not my place to say whether sleep training is good or bad. But it IS my place to ask all the sleep experts to consider struggling mums when sharing their posts. New mums are extremely vulnerable and can easily pushed over the edge.

Besides, whether we like it or not, we WILL mess up our kids in one way or another. If you don’t sleep train but are, for instance, emotionally unavailable—what is worse?

We all do our best with what we know. So PLEASE, keep educating but let mums make their choices without making them feel guilty.

They need help and support.

#newmumlife #firsttimemum #postnatal

OMG, this man! When I first read the story of Para

OMG, this man! When I first read the story of Paraiya and Arthur, it pierced my heart and echoed through every fibre of my soul.. That feeling hasn’t faded over the years. When I was selecting a charity to support through my ‘Motherhood - The Unspoken’ audiobook project, the choice was clear. There was no hesitation.

Dear Hamish @hrmagoffin, I know I don’t need to say ‘keep up the incredible work’ because I have no doubt you will continue being unstoppable. And that’s just one of the many reasons I admire you so much. Paraiya and Arthur would be so proud of you, and I truly believe they still are. ❤️

#ppd #postnataldepression #postpartumdepression #maternalmentalhealth #firsttimemum #postnatalhealth 😘#postpartumjourney

I am proud to have shared my PPD story for another

I am proud to have shared my PPD story for another wonderful publication. I never read these articles as it’s too painful to relive, but I trust the journalist, Gina Kalsi, to have done a brilliant job and ensured all the information is accurate. I hope it will help those who need it. <3

Drop me a DM if you’d like to read the whole piece and I’ll send you the link. Xx

@mailonlinesocial

#mumoftwins #newmumlife #postnataldepression #ppd #postpartumdepression #postnatallife #postpartum

One of MANY unspoken truths about (early) motherho

One of MANY unspoken truths about (early) motherhood: 👇

Becoming a mum reawakens your inner child and often brings up old, unresolved wounds. I share how this looked like for me in my book Motherhood: The Unspoken: 👇

‘I found it hard to accept that it wasn’t just the two of us in our place anymore. I couldn’t bear the kids being there and constantly kept asking myself why we were so stupid and why we had them. I longed to turn back time and erase the decision to have children.

The tears were almost constantly flowing down my face, especially when hanging children’s clothes on the dryer, as this reminded me of their existence.

I remember walking down the city with a blank expression and watching the people around me. There were people with business-like faces, while others smiled. Some were talking, some were walking, or drinking coffee. Everything seemed to be pointless.

I cried even when I went to a shop because it made me realise that I’d no longer be able to pop out like this anytime I wanted to. I remember walking down the street with tears running down my face, and I didn’t care. My life was gone forever.

I felt that the only thing the boys did was scream, and the only thing I did was feed and change.

That was it— my life in its prime. I didn’t feel like a mother or someone who could be responsible for another human being or give them security and support.

I’d reconnected with my inner child, who had been talking to me insistently day and night.

Who will now support me? Who will comfort me when I’m feeling down? Who will chase away monsters from underneath my bed?

I couldn’t silence that voice. The more I tried to suppress it, the louder it called—hello, I’m here! Why is no one listening to me?’

To continue reading my story, click the link in my bio.

Design is reposted from @joinphoenixhealth ❤️

#postnataldepression #postnatallife #postpartumlife #ppd #fourthtrimester #firsttimemum #firsttimemom

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