Ivana Poku Having real friends makes ALL THE DIFFERENCE in the way a new mum experiences motherhood.
Without friends, a new mum simply cannot thrive.
Especially a first-time mum!
I can still vividly remember how lonely I felt after becoming a mum.
I found it really hard to cope with all the changes that motherhood brought into my life.
I felt stuck and isolated.
Whenever I saw other mums walking with their buggies chatting or having fun, I felt a pang of sadness and jealousy.
I wanted to have what they had but I didn’t know where to find it.
Maybe you are feeling the same right now.
Maybe you find yourself typing New mum no friends to Google hoping to find an answer to the question that is becoming more intense by the day: Where do I meet mummy friends?
Becoming a new mum is a life-changing experience no one has prepared us for and is totally normal to want to share it with someone who is going through the same.
However, as a new mum, it can feel daunting and overwhelming to find new friends.
As a new mum, your mind and body is going through so much, you are emotional and vulnerable.
AND…
You simply don’t want any friends.
You want friends who feel like you do.
You want friends who will understand you and won’t judge you.
Because frankly, being a new mum means a cocktail of emotions that are not always pretty.
It’s therefore certainly not easy to open up to other people.
You want to find someone you click with and feel comfortable talking to.
THIS is what often makes the whole process of finding friends as a new mum daunting and stressful.
But don’t worry, I’ve got you covered!
In this post, I share my top tips on how to find new mum friends fast!
Let’s dive straight in!
1. Local baby groups & baby classes
Baby groups are a WONDERFUL place for finding new mummy friends!
However, it can feel difficult to attend them, especially if you are a first-time mum who is in the thick of things.
You worry other mums cope better than you and that they would judge you.
I felt the same when my twins were small.
I desperately wanted to visit this specific local baby group but I was terrified to show up.
What will they think of me?
But eventually, I pulled through his fear and it was one of the best decisions I had made at the time.
It was extremely refreshing to talk to other adults and see that I was not alone.
Although I didn’t know it at the time – most of the mums I met in this baby group, felt just like I did: lonely and overwhelmed.
They were just – like me – too scared to talk about it.
If you are having similar feelings at the thought of visiting a baby group, please know that you really have nothing to worry about.
We are all in the same boat.
Even if some mums seem to be ‘perfect’, you never know what is happening behind closed doors.
When I was suffering from postnatal depression, I too seemed like the happy mum who is enjoying every moment of motherhood.
But in fact, as soon as I came home and closed the door behind me, I would burst into tears.
So please, research local baby groups or baby classes in your area, choose one (or a few) that you like and go.
Don’t overthink it just go.
Although it can be hard at first, the more open you will be with other mums, the more connections and friendships you will make!
2. Parenting apps
Parenting apps work very well, especially for busy and introverted mums.
They also often give you the confidence to join in-person groups or classes.
Here are the most popular parenting apps where you can socialise and meet new mum friends!
Mush app
Mush is a friendly app for new mums ensuring you stay happy, confident, and connected through every stage of motherhood.
With the app, you can meet a lot of mums in your area, learn from experts or organise mummy meet-ups, and much more!
Peanut app
Peanut app connects women who are at a similar stage in life–from fertility, pregnancy, and motherhood through to menopause.
With the app, you to connect with other mums, ask questions & share advice, and listen to pods & connect with experts.
Bumply
Designed for expecting mums, Bumply connects you with other pregnant people in your area, so you can share the highs and lows of pregnancy, building supportive friendships that will prove invaluable both during your pregnancy and once your baby is born.
3. Buggy walks
Buggy walks have become very popular as they connect two important aspects – exercise (walking) and socialising.
They are a fun way for mums, dads, grandparents, and carers to meet new friends, chat, and share experiences on a safe and welcoming walk led by trained walk leaders.
To find a buggy walk in your area, simply put ‘buggy walk near me’ in the Google search field!
4. Facebook groups
Facebook groups are a great way to meet mum friends online!
You have literally thousands of Facebook groups to choose from, from local mum groups to groups focused on a specific subject, problem, or stage of life, for instance:
- First-time mums over 40 groups
- Baby sleep groups
- Pregnancy groups
- Mums of multiples groups
- Breastfeeding mums groups
- Postnatal mental health groups
to name but a few!
Some groups have thousands of members, some of them only a few hundred or less.
Some of them are private and some are public.
To find the right group for you, make sure to choose one that matches your needs and, more importantly, is ENGAGED!
If a group is dead (meaning no one comments and engages with the posts), you know it is not the right one for finding new friends.
Make your research, join the groups you like, engage with other mums, and enjoy the connections you create!
5. Instagram
Instagram is another great platform for finding new friends!
Why not try and engage with other mums in your area and see where it goes?
If you live in London for instance, type in the search field this hashtag: #londonmums.
Instagram will then generate all the posts tagged with this hashtag.
Go to ‘recent posts’ and have look at the most recent posts people have posted using this hashtag,
That’ ‘s all!
You can then start engaging with mums you feel the connection with right away either in comments or via DM.
Enjoy and have fun with it!
6. WhatsApp Support Group
You are also more than welcome to join my WhatsApp support group for new mums! It’s a group of mums worldwide where we support each other, share our joys & struggles, and are comfortable sharing and talking about anything.
If you would like to join us, please DM me on Instagram with the word “WHATSAPP”.
7. Google
This one seems obvious but is often overlooked.
Simple type ‘new mums near me’ in the search field and see what comes up!
You are welcome! 😉
Simple tips to make new mum friends
There you go!
Here are my top tips on where to meet new mum friends regardless of whether you are in introvert or extrovert, or if you are stay at home mum or working full time.
We all need friends!
Which tip do you like the most? Let me know in the comments!
