Is It Normal to Feel Angry at Your Husband During Pregnancy?

Last Updated on September 14, 2026 by Ivana Poku

You love your husband.

You chose him and built a life with him.

Then you got pregnant, and he annoys you like never before:

The way he chews…
The way he asks, “You okay?”
The way he just… exists.

You watch him eat, and you want to scream.

Not because of the eating….

But, well… You don’t even know why.

If you’re thinking, “What is wrong with me?”, let me reassure you: nothing is wrong with you.

MANY mums-to-be feel annoyed or even repulsed by their partner.

They just don’t talk about it.

Not that I blame them! It’s not easy to admit you feel aversion towards your husband who’s practically not doing anything wrong.

But it really is very common.

In this post, I explain why and how to cope when the aversion gets the best of you.

But first, hello!

I’m Ivana, a mum of three boys (including twins), postnatal depression survivor, and author of Motherhood: The Unspoken, on a mission to create a world where mums feel seen and supported.

In this post, I cover:

Why you feel angry with your husband in pregnancy
The role of hormones, fatigue, and stress in the mix
Proven tips to cope with these feelings

Let’s start with why this happens.

Table of Contents

Oh, the pregnancy hormones

I know we don’t like to talk about pregnancy hormones, but they really play a big role in how you feel.

Hormones like oestrogen and progesterone rise and fall during pregnancy. They can affect the way your brain works, which can change your mood and emotions.

Think of it like your brain getting a new operating system while you’re pregnant. A lot is changing, and often very quickly.

One day, you might feel totally fine. The next, your husband’s presence makes you want to scream.

The good news is that it’s not really about him.

Your body is just doing a HUGE amount of work and all those hormonal changes can affect how you feel.

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Your brain is in protect mode

When you’re pregnant, your brain switches into protect mode.

You might:

get irritated easily and for no reason
need more personal space
feel overwhelmed by noise or mess
want things done a certain way

Why?

Because your brain is trying hard to keep your baby safe.

Coping with aversion to husband during pregnancy, new mum tips

It is constantly checking for anything that could be a problem or make you or your baby feel unsafe.

And when it’s busy doing that, you can have less patience left for everything else.

And that’s ok! It’s supposed to be that way.

You’re exhausted (properly exhausted)

Growing a baby is exhausting – both physically and emotionally.

Your body is working 24/7 building organs, bones, a brain, and a whole human.

(I’m not sure we realise how huge this is.)

And if you’re like me – when you’re tired, you’re more irritable lol.

So if you snap, it’s not really his fault. He’s just at the wrong place at the wrong time. 😂

Your body doesn’t feel like yours

As you’ve surely noticed by now, pregnancy changes your body in many ways:

your belly grows
your breasts change shape
you feel nauseous or exhausted (or both)
you have less (or no) energy

So it’s only understandable if you don’t feel like hugging and cuddling.

Don’t worry, you won’t feel like this forever! Your body just needs more comfort and space right now.

He can’t understand what you’re going through

Now, here’s the most annoying thing.

It’s both of your baby, but you’re the one who has to grow it and deal with all the symptoms:

feeling sick
struggling to sleep
dealing with aches and pains
having intrusive thoughts
to name but a few

You also have to sacrifice so much of your life and give up many of the things you used to do.

Meanwhile, your partner’s life may look pretty normal and hasn’t changed much. He doesn’t have to deal with the sickness, the tiredness, the aches and emotional rollercoasters.

No wonder you get annoyed with him!

It can also feel lonely.

Because no matter how much he tries, he can’t truly understand what you’re going through.

But remember, he isn’t supposed to understand.

His job is to be there for you and give you the support you need and deserve.

(And, of course, the same goes the other way. :))

If you’re too exhausted to even try explaining it, you don’t have to. I put together 12 texts you can just send instead – you can grab them here.

Your brain is carrying too much

Growing a baby is exhausting, but the mental load is often the heaviest.

You’re thinking about:

becoming a mum
money
sleep deprivation
how life will change
whether you’ll be a good mum
what you need to buy for the nursery
what to pack in the hospital bag

You have to admit that’s a lot to carry around in your head.

I feel overwhelmed just writing it down, let alone actually living it!

So even things that you’d normally ignore can now feel like the last straw.

And unfortunately for him, he’s the person closest to you, so he often gets the brunt of it.

Again, it’s not about him – it’s your brain saying, “I can’t deal with one more thing!”

I also wrote a detailed post on pregnancy rage here.

How to stop feeling angry with your husband

The good news is that pregnancy anger usually goes away on its own once your hormones settle.

But you don’t have to just wait it out.

There are a few things you can do right now that will help (and stop it doing damage to your relationship in the meantime).

I could give you a long list of tips, but I know that the more tips you get, the less likely you are to actually use any of them.

So below, I’m sharing the ones that matter most:

1. Accept your anger

You know the saying that what you resist, persists? It’s so very true. When you accept the anger instead of pushing it away, it will lose its power.

2. Talk to your husband

Sharing your feelings is really important. If you keep them inside, they can build up and come out later in a way you really don’t want.

Speak to him when you’re calm (or calm-ish) and without blaming or judging. Focus on finding a solution, not proving who’s right.

If you find it hard to talk to him, these 12 prewritten texts can help!

4. Be compassionate with yourself

Talk to yourself the way you would to a friend in the same situation.

Or imagine yourself as a little girl and talk to her. Because really, whenever you speak to yourself, you’re also speaking to that little girl in you.

For instance: “My mind and body are going through a lot, so of course I’m angry. It doesn’t say anything about me. Many women feel like this. It’s only temporary and it will pass.”

If you want more words like these, I’ve written 27 of them. They’re free – grab them here.

Final word

So to sum it up, my darling…

If you’re feeling angry with your husband during pregnancy, you’re not a bad partner or a bad person!

You’re a human being with a brain and body doing something big and extraordinary.

Give yourself time and compassion, communicate with your husband, and trust that the anger will go away soon.

It really will!

If you have any questions, please leave a comment below or DM me on Instagram. I LOVE to hear from my readers!

And if “communicate with your husband” feels like one more thing on your plate right now, let my 12 pre-written texts do it for you. Screenshot one, press send, and let it take the first step you don’t have the energy for.

FAQs

Is it normal to feel angry with my partner in pregnancy?

Yes! Many pregnant women experience a short temper. Pregnancy hormones, mental overload, and exhaustion can make small things feel very annoying. It doesn’t mean you stopped loving your partner or that he’s actually doing anything wrong. It means your body is going through a lot.

Can pregnancy hormones make me feel repulsed by my husband?

Absolutely. Hormonal shifts, especially in oestrogen and progesterone, can heighten your sensitivity and cause (temporary) feelings of aversion toward your partner. These feelings usually go away after pregnancy. If they don’t, it means there is something deeper going on that needs to be addressed.

How long does aversion toward your husband last during pregnancy?

For most women, these feelings don’t last too long. Once hormones settle and you adjust to all the changes that come with pregnancy and life with a newborn, your patience and connection with your partner usually return to normal. Again – if they don’t, it needs to be addressed. I would strongly recommend speaking to a therapist or counsellor then.

If you’re not sure where to start, the NHS has free mental health support during pregnancy, and PANDAS Foundation offers free support for perinatal mental health.

What can I do if I feel distant from my husband during pregnancy?

Communicate openly with your partner without blame, be honest about your emotions, and listen to your body. When you recognise that these feelings are normal, it can massively reduce guilt and stress.

Could feeling irritated at my partner be a sign of postpartum depression?

Not usually – temporary irritation during pregnancy is common. But if you notice persistent sadness, hopelessness, or loss of interest in things you usually enjoy, it could indicate prenatal or postpartum depression, and you should definitely speak to a healthcare professional. Or start with someone you trust first if that’s easier. Either way, speak up.

Why does it feel like my husband doesn’t understand what I’m going through?

Pregnancy is a unique experience that only you can fully feel. Your partner might be supportive, but since he isn’t experiencing these changes himself, it can feel like he doesn’t understand. He’s not supposed to understand how it feels. His job is to be there for you and support you at all times – and vice versa.

How to stop being angry with my husband during pregnancy?

Take care of yourself physically and mentally, communicate your feelings calmly, accept that some irritation is normal, and give yourself grace. You are not the only one going through this and if you follow the tips above, they will go away eventually.

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Ivana Poku

PhDr. Ivana Poku is the author of Motherhood – The Unspoken, an award-winning blogger and maternal mental health advocate. Through her work, she is on a mission to create a world where mums feel seen, heard and supported. Ivana is also a mum of three boys, including twins, and lives with her family in a small coastal town in Scotland.