41 Postpartum Affirmations for the Moments No One Warned You About (+ Free Printable)

Last Updated on August 30, 2026 by Ivana Poku

Hey, lovely lady!

I’m Ivana – a mum of three boys (including twins) and author of Motherhood – The Unspoken, on a mission to create a world where mums feel seen and supported.

I have wanted to write this post for a long time now, but do you know why I didn’t?

Because I know many mums dismiss positive affirmations as they feel like they’re lying to themselves when they say them out loud.

And you’re right there are plenty of affirmations that sound like a lie.

For instance, when you have a very bad day and then you say “I am a good mum” to yourself in the mirror.

Your brain immediately goes: no you’re not. And gives you plenty of evidence to prove it.

But this is not the type of affirmations I will talk about in this post.

Because they shouldn’t feel like false positivity. They should feel empowering and resonate with you.

For that reason, there isn’t one affirmation that will resonate with everyone.

We all bring our own experiences and beliefs to them, so what might click with you might not necessarily click with someone else.

So in this post, you’ll find 41 postpartum affirmations you can choose from – plus my personal tip on how to create your own.

They’re all sorted by the exact moment you might need them – the night feed, the day you cry, the anger , or the body that you no longer recognise.

I’ll also tell you why they may feel fake at first, and the one small change that makes them actually land.

And if you’re find things really hard right now, grab my list of 27 free affirmations that I designed especially for when motherhood feels too much. I promise, they will bring you relief in seconds!

Now, let’s begin.

Related posts:

• Postnatal anxiety explained: Why you’re constantly on edge after birth
• Having a baby is not a joyful experience
• Regretting having a baby? This is more common than you think.

Why Affirmations Feel Fake (And How to Fix That)

Here’s the truth.

Most affirmations fail because they’re too big:

• “I am a wonderful mother.”
• “I am strong and capable.”
• “My body is beautiful.”

When your brain hears those, it calls you a liar. So instead of feeling better, you feel worse – because now you’re failing at affirmations too!

Here’s why it happens:

Your brain will only accept a statement that sits close to what you already believe.

If you jump too far, it rejects the whole thing.

So the trick is to shrink the gap.

Not “I am a wonderful mother.”

But “I am doing something incredibly hard, and I’m not supposed to know everything. I’m learning every day.”

See the difference?

The second one is impossible to argue with. It’s just true, and your brain lets it in.

That’s the rule I used for every affirmation below: so that they are easy to believe.

Now, let’s get to them.

Affirmations For Sleepless Nights

Nights are especially hard, as everything quiets down and all your worries and negative thoughts that have been suppressed by the chaos of the day come to the surface

I remember feeding my twins at midnight and genuinely believing the sun would never come up again.

But it always did!

Say these to yourself in the dark:

1. This hour is hard, but it will pass.
2. I don’t have to enjoy this to be good at it.
3. The sun will come up. It always does.
4. Nothing has gone wrong. Everyone is ok. That’s the whole job right now.
5. I can feel lonely and still be grateful.

See also my post 13 Life-saving tips to cope with sleep deprivation. 

Affirmations For When You Cry

Crying is more common than you may realise.

In the first months after our twins arrived, I would cry most of the time.

At the time, I wondered what was wrong with me but now I know it’s just a natural part of becoming a mum.

6. My body is doing something huge and tears are part of it.
7. I don’t need a reason to cry today.
8. This feeling is strong, but it won’t last forever.
9. I’m allowed to cry. It means I’m adjusting to the biggest transformation of my life.
10. Most new mums cry, they just don’t talk about it. I don’t either. (If this is the case.)

Affirmations For When You Don’t Feel the Bond

This one is extremely important.

People told you that the second you see your baby, you’d be flooded with love like nothing you’d ever known.

And for some mums, that happens, but for many (myself included), the bond doesn’t come straight away.

You look at your baby and you feel nothing special. Maybe protective, but no rush of love you’d expected.

Then a guilt kicks in and it feels like a sharp stab in the centre of your heart. Because what kind of mother doesn’t love her own baby?

It took me a lot of time to learn this, but trust me, you do love your baby, even if the bond is not there yet.

And it’s more common that you think!

11. Maternal bond is a process. It doesn’t happen overnight.
12. I love my baby even if it doesn’t feel like fountains and rainbows.
13. Feeling numb doesn’t make me cold.
14. We’re two strangers getting to know each other.
15. There is no test I have to pass, so I haven’t failed it.

You may also like:

• Postpartum Mental Health: What’s Normal & When to Ask for Help
• “Rub Me, Don’t Pat Me” – Why Touch Feels Different After Baby
• When Do Babies Get Easier? The Honest Newborn Timeline No One Tells You

Affirmations For When You Don’t Feel Like Yourself

If you don’t feel like yourself anymore after baby, that’s totally normal too.

After all, you are not the same person anymore and it takes time to get used to the new version of you.

And it’s also okay  and natural to grieve the old one!

You don’t have to love being a mum right now. When you’re really honest with yourself, there’s not much to love at this point.

But again, it will pass and your feelings will change!

16. I’m someone’s mum now. It’s ok to feel different.
17. I am and will always be me.
18. This is just a transition period. I will feel like me again.
19. My whole life changed overnight. Of course I feel like this!
20. There’s no right or wrong way to feel. All my feelings are valid.

Affirmations For When Feeding Isn’t Going the Way You Planned

I desperately wanted to breastfeed my twins.

A part of me had a real desire to experience the sensation when you feel your baby. But to a big extent, I believed that as a good mum, I simply “had to” breastfeed.

However, at the time I didn’t know breastfeeding was a skill.

The twins wouldn’t latch for weeks, but I kept torturing myself day and night. Sadly, I didn’t get the right support or education on breastfeeding so even though it eventually happened, it cost me my mental wellbeing.

And I don’t want this to happen to you too!

Honestly, a baby coudn’t care less if he’s getting a formula or a breastmilk. As long as their stomach is full, they’re happy.

21. A fed baby is the whole goal. In a few years, I won’t care at all – and neither will my baby.
22. How my baby eats says nothing about what kind of mum I am.
23. I made the best decision I could with the support I had.
24. Feeling guilty isn’t proof I did something wrong.
25. The best gift I can give my baby is my happiness.

Affirmations For When You Feel Angry

Postpartum rage is another uncomfortable emotion that can come out of nowehre – and when you expect it the least:

• When your baby is happy
• When you have a good day
• When your husband does something nice for you

It makes you think, What is wrong with me?

Nothing is wrong with you, my lovely.

Rage in early motherhood is almost always exhaustion with nowhere to go.

You’re:

• depleted
• touched out
• all you do each day is feed and change nappies
• you’ve had no time for yourself in weeks

Anger is a completely natural emotion. It’s how all that built-up exhaustion, frustration and overwhelm comes out.

26. My anger is exhaustion with nowhere to go.
27. I can feel furious and still be safe and loving.
28. Good mums get angry at times. All of them.
29. This feeling is telling me I need something, and I’m allowed to need things.
30. I can put my baby down somewhere safe and walk away for two minutes.
31. One bad moment doesn’t cancel out everything else I do.

Affirmations For When You’re Comparing Yourself to Other Mums

You see a fellow mum in a baby group and you feel jealous. She just seem to cope with everything so well! Much better than you:

• She got her baby in a routine
• Her hair is styled
• Her make up is on
• Her baby sleeps through the night at six weeks
• She is glowing and she smiles a lot

Meanwhile you’re barely holding it together.

Here’s what I want you to know: you’re comparing your Tuesday afternoon to her best 30 seconds. That’s not a fair comparison and a complete waste of your time and energy.

32. I only see her highlights. She only sees mine.
33. My baby is not a report card.
34. Different doesn’t mean worse.
35. The mum in that photo has probably cried today too.
36. I am the right mother for my baby.

Affirmations For When You Miss Who You Were Before

This one still gets me.

You had a life, friends, work, plans, lie-ins, the freedom to walk out of the door whenever and however you wanted.

Then overnight it was gone, and you’re not allowed to say you miss it – because you wanted this baby, and you love this baby, and what kind of person grieves a life they chose to leave?

You want the truth?

Every. Kind. Of. Person.

It even has a name: postpartum grief. And it doesn’t mean for one second that you regret having your child.

37. Missing my old life doesn’t mean I regret this one.
38. Grief and love can sit in the same chest.
39. The parts of me I miss are paused, not gone.
40. I’m allowed to want something that’s only mine.
41. I will get my life back.

How to Use These

Now, let’s talk about how to use these affirmations and make the most of them!

A list you read once won’t do much.

Here’s what makes the difference:

1. Pick three, not forty-one.

Choose the three that made your chest go tight when you read them. Those are the ones your brain needs! Ignore the rest (for now).

2. Attach them to something you already do.

Say them while you’re doing something ordinary, like washing bottles, waiting for the kettle, or feeding the baby. It’s much easier to create a new habit when it’s bolted onto an old one.

3. Say them out loud, even when you feel silly.

Reading them in your head is fine, but saying them out loud is better. Don’t ask me why, but your brain just treats it differently and makes it more powerful.

4. Write the one you need most where you’ll see it.

Make it simple! Place it on a sticky note, on the mirror, or as your phone lock screen. Whatever helps keep it at the front of your mind.

How To Create Your Own Affirmations

Now, let’s make things even more exciting!

As I said earlier, the right affirmations have to resonate with you.

They may do nothing for someone else, but they can change everything for you.

So I want you to have some fun with it and try this:

When your inner critic pops up, or you have any kind of negative thought, consciously change the angle you look at it.

Because there isn’t always one way to look at a situation – and sometimes changing the way you see it can completely change how you feel.

So all you need to do is change your perception.

Here is an example. You feel like you can’t cope, and you tell yourself, “I can’t do this anymore!”

Now stop right there, look at the situation from someone else’s perspective and try another angle. There is no “right” angle. You need to keep trying until you find the one that will shift something inside of you.

For instance:

• It’s very hard, but I know it won’t last forever. The fact that many women have more than one child is proof of that.
• As the baby grows, things will change dramatically. I’ll focus on one day at a time, not on next month or next year.
• I am not alone. There are thousands of mums around the world who feel the same way right now.

One Honest Thing Before You Go

Affirmations help a lot and can do some real magic for you.

But they don’t treat severe postnatal depression or postnatal anxiety.

If the low feeling has stuck around past a few weeks, if you can’t enjoy anything at all, if you’re having thoughts that frighten you, or if you feel completely disconnected from your baby – please tell your doctor or health visitor.

I had postnatal depression after the twins, and I waited far too long to say it out loud because I thought I was failing.

I wasn’t.

And you’re not either.

Getting help isn’t the opposite of coping – it is coping.

Final Word

Here’s what I really want you to take from this, my darling.

You don’t need to (and you can’t) feel happy all the time.

You’re allowed to:

• find this hard
• cry for no reason
• miss your old life
• get furious
• have doubts or regrets

And still be the best mum your baby could wish for!

These 41 postpartum affirmations exist to remind you of that every single day:

• Say them in the dark
• Say them badly
• Say them while crying
• Say them when you’re happy

Your brain is listening, even now.

If you want more of the honest stuff nobody tells you about early motherhood, that’s exactly what I wrote Motherhood – The Unspoken for.

Which affirmation hit hardest for you? Drop it in the comments and I’ll respond as soon as I can.

Related posts you might find helpful:

• How to Put Yourself First As a Mum (Without Guilt)
• A day in the life of a new mum (the parts no one shows you)
• Why counting down until bedtime doesn’t make you a bad mum
• Why am I jealous of my partner after having a baby?
• It Takes a Village: How You Can Build Your Own Mum Community